The late former PM, Malcolm Fraser popularised the catchphrase, ‘life wasn’t meant to be easy’ in recognition that there are a lot of trials and tribulations we will simply have to face up to in life and relationships.
Naturally many of us need a hand from time to time, to help us get through some of the tougher times – death, divorce, illness, job loss, family relationships, financial problems, domestic violence, to name a handful.
Old wounds can fester and family schisms deepen as a parent ages, especially where wills and inheritances are involved.
It’s tempting for people to think that these problems largely affect younger people; that by the time we reach our later years, many of these tribulations will have evaporated or lessened and that most people are pretty content.
Well, maybe. If you’re lucky. But the reality is that, for many people, problems don’t just go away. An unhappy marriage can morph into a miserable and unbearable existence with seemingly few options for escape. If illness or frailty hits, there can be huge implications.
Old wounds can fester and family schisms deepen as a parent ages, especially where wills and inheritances are involved.
You might be aware of the national community based counselling organisation, Relationships Australia, which has long provided specialised counselling support to individuals and families struggling to negotiate challenging problems and relationships.
A new service focused on ageing
Well just recently, Relationships Australia has announced a one year trial of a new counselling and mediation service called Elder Relationship Services to support families and individuals who need help negotiating the often complex issues related to ageing.
National Executive Officer, Alison Brook said in a statement that it is a service specifically developed, “in response to changing demographic, health and social issues which have resulted in an ageing Australian population and increasingly complex family structures.”
“It’s a common story as we age,” she said, “that family conflict emerges around significant health issues, where older parents will live or how estates will be divided.”
She said the service has been designed to help families to have those “often difficult conversations and resolve differences in ways that improve relationships.”
“We also want to support families to plan for future medical, health, financial or living arrangements and make decisions that protect the interests, rights and safety of all family members,” Ms Brook said.
How the trial works
The Elder Relationship Service was launched in January and will run as a pilot for twelve months in Canberra ACT, Wagga Wagga NSW, Kew VIC, Adelaide SA, Launceston TAS and Moreton Bay QLD.
It is being managed by Relationships Australia and staffed by trained counsellors and mediators with specific skills in delivering services to people experiencing aging-related issues.
Attending the Elder Relationship Service is voluntary and confidential and you can attend the service on your own, with your partner, as a family, or adult children and parents can come by themselves. In any case, everyone gets the opportunity to express his or her view.
While decisions made at an Elder Relationship Service session are not legally binding, Relationships Australia can help you with documenting your agreements.
What does it cost? All Relationships Australia services are subsidised by the Federal Government and clients pay a fee based on their family income.
While it’s only a trial at this stage, it will be evaluated at the end of the twelve months. It’s hard to imagine that it won’t be a success overall but we will very much look forward to hearing the results.
To find out more about the Elder Relationship Service click here.
