If you’ve ever found yourself in an argument about the best way to raise your child (or grandchild), do not worry – you’re by no means the only one.
But how do you ease the tension when this occurs?
A recent study from the US has looked into this, and provided some tips for keeping the peace when there are disagreements between generations.
The survey, When parents and grandparents disagree, examined 2,016 parents with children aged 18 and under.
Most parents (89%) reported their child sees at least one grandparent often or occasionally.
But there were some disagreements regarding parenting style with 40% of respondents citing at least one major or minor disagreement between the two parties.
Researchers found 40% of parents believed grandparents are too soft on the children, 14% believe they’re too tough and 46% have said disagreement have arisen from both.
The key areas of contention are:
- 57% disagree about discipline
- 44% disagree about meals/snacks
- 36% disagree about TV/screen time
- 27% disagree about manners
- 25% disagree about health/safety
Sadly, 32% of parents – almost one in three – had limited the amount of time their children see their grandparents after disagreements, while 42% of respondents limited their grandparent time for grandparents who refused to change.
Sarah Clark, co-director of the C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll on Children’s Health at Michigan Medicine, says there should be more effort to find common ground.
“Parents and grandparents may not always see eye to eye on parenting but if conflicts aren’t resolved, no one wins,” Clark says.
“Parents who had major disagreements with grandparents were also likely to feel that the conflicts had a negative impact on the relationship between the child and the grandparent.”
As is often the case, it seems that communication and finding the middle ground is key.
